The Big "V"

Most of you who know us are probably thinking the "V" in question refers to a certain little procedure that would ensure we remain a family of five. But in fact, I'm referring to probably the funniest conversation my husband (or I!) has ever had with one of our kids. Behold, a transcription of a recent talk he had with the Schmoopette, age three-and-three-quarters, while giving her a bath.

Schmoopette: "Daddy, boys have penises and girls have cho-chos."
Husband: "Yes, boys have penises and girls have vaginas."
Schmoopette: "Do I have to say vagina?"
Husband: "Well no. Vagina is usually what grown-ups say, though."
Schmoopette: "When I'm a grown-up, I'm going to have a biiiiiiiig vagina!"

--Silence--

Schmoopette: "Daddy, will I have hair on my vagina?"
--Pause--
Husband: "Yes, most women do"
Schmoopette: "When will I start to have hair on my vagina?"
--Pause--
Husband: "I think when you're a teenager"
Schmoopette: "Does V [13-year-old cousin] have hair on HER vagina?"
Husband: "Um..."
--Pause--
Husband: "It's not nice to talk about other people's private parts"
Schmoopette: "OK, Daddy!"

--Silence--

Who else thinks my husband deserves a medal for the way he handled this conversation without screaming for my help in the bath or quickly changing the subject? Go, Daddy!

Comments

[Wife and Mommy]

Bwaha!!

Way to go, Husband!

[Becca]

nice! that is awesomely handled. Steve and I have discussed this and it seems that I will be handling all these talks. Otherwise our kids will go through life thinking everyone has a hoo-hah. Yup, that's what my 37 year old fiance calls it. *snicker*

[Sally]

OMG, I'm getting hives just reading that!
LOL!
Poor hubby.

[Phart]

Lol! Very nice job, Hans!

[Christi]

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA H!!!!!! I'd be so happy for Robert to get that one and not me. LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Stimey]

Very nicely done. I probably wouldn't have done as well.

[Keely]

Hahaha! Kids never cease to crack me up. Definitely medal worthy!

[Linda]

"When I'm a grown-up, I'm going to have a biiiiiiiig vagina!"

OMG. That is TOO FUNNY!

[natalie]

oh poor Hans. I love that one.

[Adina (Nola's Mom)]

Classic! Ross and I loved it.

[Shevonne]

Hahahaha...that is awesome

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[Lindsay Lebresco]

Serious kudos go out to your husband. It reminds me of the time my 2 you son tried to "nurse" my 1 yo daughter with his "bird" during bath time. Scared the heck out of me - had to call my husband in for back up!
For a minute there, I was very interested in visiting cooliris.com as I thought it related to your post (you'd think that, wouldn't you?) - that could've been very entertaining!